Estate Planning for Unmarried Couples: Protecting the Life You’ve Built Together
- Crystal Guiga
- 2 days ago
- 5 min read
Unmarried couples face unique risks when it comes to estate planning. Having the right estate plan can ensure your partner is cared for, no matter what. Read more...
You’ve built a life with someone you love - sharing a home, experiences, and maybe even finances - but without legal marriage, the law doesn’t automatically recognize your relationship. That means if something happens to you, your partner could be left without legal rights to your property, finances, or even decisions about your medical care.
In this article, you’ll learn why unmarried couples face greater legal risks, what key planning steps you can take to protect each other, and how my Whole Life Planning® process ensures your wishes are honored, no matter what life brings.
Why the Law Doesn’t Protect Unmarried Partners
When married couples face illness or death, state law provides automatic rights and protections. But for unmarried partners, those rights don’t exist unless you’ve put them in writing.
Without an estate plan:
Your partner can’t access your bank accounts or manage bills if you’re incapacitated.
They might be excluded from medical decisions, even if they know your wishes best.
Your property could go to biological family members, not your partner, regardless of how long you’ve been together.
For example, if you own your home in your name alone and you die without a plan, your partner could lose their home overnight - even if they’ve lived there for years or helped pay the mortgage.
And while some states recognize “common law marriage,” those laws vary dramatically and apply only under very specific circumstances. Many couples assume they’re covered because they’ve lived together for years, but unless your state legally recognizes that relationship and you’ve met every technical requirement, your partner still has no rights under the law.
These outcomes aren’t just unfair, they’re avoidable. With the right plan, you can give your partner the legal authority and protection the law won’t automatically provide.
Essential Legal Tools Every Unmarried Couple Needs
The good news is that with thoughtful planning, you can ensure your relationship is legally recognized in the ways that matter most. Here are tools I use in my Whole Life Planning process to protect unmarried couples:
1. Health Care Documents
Without legal authorization, hospitals must turn to your next of kin, not your loved one, for decisions if you’re incapacitated.
A Health Care Power of Attorney gives your partner the right to make medical decisions for you. Pair it with a Living Will or Advance Directive that outlines your wishes for end-of-life care, so your partner can advocate for you confidently.
You can also include a HIPAA Authorization, which allows medical professionals to share information with your partner. Without this, privacy laws may prevent them from even knowing what’s happening.
2. Financial Power of Attorney
This document gives your partner legal authority to handle financial matters if you’re unable to. Without it, someone will have to go to court to gain control, delaying urgent decisions like paying your mortgage or medical bills, keeping your life running smoothly during a crisis.
3. A Will or Trust
A Will determines what happens to your assets after you die, and a Trust determines what happens after you die and if you are incapacitated. Without a Will or Trust state law dictates who inherits, and unmarried partners are not recognized heirs.
Moreover, if you only have a Will, your loved ones will have to go through probate. Probate is a court process that can take months or years, often becoming expensive and emotionally draining - especially for someone who isn’t legally recognized as family. It’s also a public process. Anyone can view the court records to see what assets you had, the value of your assets, who your loved ones are and where they live, as well as other personal information you may not want available for public consumption.
A Trust, on the other hand, avoids probate. Trusts can ensure your partner receives the home, joint property, or financial accounts you want them to have, without the delays and public nature of probate court. It also gives you flexibility to provide for other loved ones, like children, parents, or friends, while protecting your partner’s right to remain in the home or access shared funds.
4. Property and Beneficiary Designations
Even the best plan fails if your assets aren’t titled properly, and beneficiary designations don’t match your intentions. If this happens, your assets may bypass your partner entirely.
5. A Written Cohabitation Agreement
While not traditionally thought of as part of “estate planning,” a cohabitation agreement can be invaluable for unmarried couples. This document outlines how you’ll handle shared property, expenses, and financial contributions both during your relationship and if it ends. It can help prevent disputes and make sure each partner’s contributions are respected and accounted for.
Don’t Forget Emotional and Practical Planning
Estate planning for unmarried couples isn’t just about protecting assets; it’s about protecting the person you’ve chosen as family. You have the power to decide if your partner will deal with chaos, conflict, uncertainty and unnecessary expenses after you die, or if your partner will know exactly what to do, when, and how, with the right support to make it as easy as possible. The difference depends on whether you’ve planned for the emotional and practical aspects of death, in addition to the legal tools.
When you work with me as your Personal Family Lawyer, I’ll help you not only get the right legal tools in place, but we’ll also cover the emotional and practical aspects of planning, such as:
Creating a comprehensive asset inventory and keeping it updated over time. Without a complete inventory, even the best legal document ever written can fail if your partner can’t locate everything you own.
Recording a Whole Life Interview so you can pass on your stories, values, and love. Your partner will cherish this forever and have guidance directly from you if they’re ever forced to navigate difficult decisions in your absence.
Creating open communication among your loved ones. I will support you to have difficult conversations with everyone you love about your wishes for medical care, funeral plans, and what you’d want done with your home and possessions. These conversations relieve your partner from the burden of guessing and ensure they can act with confidence when the time comes, rather than fighting your family in court.
Take the Next Step to Protect the Life You’ve Built
If you and your partner aren’t legally married, estate planning isn’t just important - it’s essential. Without it, the person you love most could lose everything you’ve worked for together. But with the right guidance, you can make sure your wishes are honored, your partner is cared for, and your love story is legally protected.
When you work with me, I’ll help you:
Clarify what would happen if either of you became incapacitated or died today.
Create a clear plan that gives each of you legal authority and protection.
Build an updated inventory of assets so nothing gets overlooked.
Schedule ongoing reviews, so your plan evolves as your life and relationship change.
Most importantly, your partner will know exactly what to do and whom to call when something happens—because I’ll be there to guide them.
Schedule your 15-minute discovery call today and find out how I can help you protect your partner, your home, and the life you’ve built together.
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